


(Love is Like a) Heatwave

by al_ex_an_d_er_hamiltons



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: A couple of sweaty idiots, All fluff and very little plot, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-29
Updated: 2019-07-31
Packaged: 2020-07-24 19:54:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20020120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/al_ex_an_d_er_hamiltons/pseuds/al_ex_an_d_er_hamiltons
Summary: The A/C goes out in the store. Patrick is hot, and David is a hot mess.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from the song (Love is Like a) Heatwave by Martha and the Vandellas. 
> 
> I love these idiots and wanted to write something fun pre-relationship. Inspired by the current global heatwave. Hasn't been edited more than me giving it a once-over, so forgive any mistakes or typos. 
> 
> Stay cool and enjoy!

Things were heating up at the store. Literally.

It wasn’t noticeable at first; the spring mornings were still cool enough that nothing was amiss for the first hour or two of work (one hour for David, two for Patrick. Of course.) Then, they assumed they were just getting warm from doing physical labor; unpacking boxes, rearranging the furniture.

But by mid-morning, sunlight was streaming through the windows, and the space was sweltering. David couldn’t help but notice that Patrick had undone one extra button, then two, on his normally well-pressed business shirt.Even David had rolled the sleeves of his sweater as far up his elbows as possible.

Patrick wiped a hand across his damp forehead, brow wrinkled in disgust as he took a sip of bottled water.His mood had worsened as the day progressed and the temperature rose. They were taking a break for a moment, David seated up on the counter and Patrick leaning against it next to him. 

“David, why did you turn the thermostat up? I know you run cold but this is ridiculous.”

“Um, excuse me?” David glared down at him, his own face sweating more than he’d like to admit was possible.

“It’s easily at least 85 degrees in here right now. You wear sweaters year-round. Just putting two-and-two together.”

“First of all, have you _looked at_ me lately? My hair has lost all of it’s volume, which is not a good look for me and not one I would voluntarily subject myself or anyone else to.” Patrick rolled his eyes as David continued, more quietly, “And also I don’t know how to change the thermostat.”

“Okay, well, something must be wrong with the A/C then. Which is great.Exactly what we need a week before opening.”Patrick sounded irritated as David tried to hide his smile, tucking his lips in and covering his hand with his mouth. It wasn’t a funny situation, David knew; if there was something seriously wrong with it, it could cost them money that they really didn’t have. But Patrick was usually so unflappable and put-together; seeing him finally come undone- and, ahem, unbuttoned- was sort of endearing. And definitely funny.

Shooting David a deadly look, he disappeared into the back, presumably to take a look at the unit in the utility closet.

“ _Shit._ It’s dead.” Patrick’s voice floated out from the back, sounding distressed. “I’m going to have to call someone to take a look at it. This is a bit out of my depth.”

Patrick returned to the front of the store, picking up his phone from next to the register and clicking around on it for a few minutes.

David took his distraction as an opportunity to watch him closely. He relished these moments when Patrick was focused on something else, allowed himself to observe and appreciate without risk of being caught. Patrick waspleasantly flushed from the heat, his shirt now untucked as well as partially unbuttoned.Even if David’s apparently-very-straight business partner was physically off-limits, he reasoned, he was at least allowed to look. 

He snapped out of his reverie when Patrick set his phone back down and walked back over to him, undoing the rest of his shirt buttons on the way. David tried to maintain his composure. Sometimes it seemed like Patrick was doing it on purpose, baiting David into staring or openly flirting with him.

“I texted Roland. His cousin is an HVAC specialist but he can’t come out until Tuesday. With as much as we have to do before the store opens next week, we’re just going to have to work through the heat.”David nodded mutely in response, not trusting himself to open his mouth at the moment, lest he find it pressed hungrily onto Patrick’s exposed clavicle.

“You okay, David? You look a little red. I’m starting to suspect heat stroke.”

David cleared his throat, nodding again, squeaking out an affirmative murmur before hopping down off the counter. He needed some space, some air.He settled himself on the opposite side of the counter from Patrick, opening a box of labels. Patrick chose this moment to remove his button-down completely, shaking it out before folding it up. The motion sent a wave of very pungent air towards David, which was the only thing that distracted him from the fact that Patrick was wearing a tank top- not a t-shirt- underneath.

“ _Woof_ , Patrick!” David clapped a hand across his nose.

Patrick looked at him, nonplussed. “What?”

“I’m not sure what is more offensive. Your odor or your…tank top.” Patrick rolled his eyes, exasperated.

“It’s hot in here, David. Not sure about you, but normal people sweat when they’re hot. Sweat smells.”

“Okay well I guess you’re really hot then, because you’re very sweaty, and very smelly.”

Patrick tilted his head, squinting at him with his lips pressed together. David’s brain finally caught up with what his mouth had just said, and felt himself flushing again.

“And _you_ are turning very red again, David. You might want to take off that ridiculous sweater before you pass out.”

“First of all, this sweater is not ridiculous. It probably cost more than your entire wardrobe, which is probably filled with a dozen matching wifebeaters. And I’m not taking it off.” He gestured to himself, sweeping his hand from head to toe. “This is a complete look. “

“Sure it is, David. Just don’t expect me to catch you when you faint.” Patrick turned and walked to the back to grab more boxes of product to label. 

David smirked, watching him walk away. Patrick wasn’t particularly muscular or built, but David appreciated the way the tank top accentuated the muscles in his shoulders and back, revealed the light patch of hair on his chest. Truly, the only thing David found offensive about it was that Patrick was still wearing a shirt at all.

An hour and many moved boxes later, David was starting to worry Patrick was right.He was completely drenched and, yes, smelling pretty ripe himself. He didn’t keep the sweater on just for aesthetics or stubbornness, however; David would never admit it to anyone, but his clothing helped camouflage his insecurities, both physical and emotional. As someone who’d had his nude photographs displayed in art galleries, he knew it was ridiculous to get so hung up on something as simple as removing a sweater. But he already felt so _seen_ around Patrick, vulnerable even fully clothed. His oversized sweaters and baggy sweatpants were his last defense.

He finally had to admit defeat, however, when he stood too quickly after crouching for another box, and swayed on his feet.

“Whoa whoa whoa,” Patrick was suddenly next to him, steadying him by lightly gripping his elbow. He steered him into a nearby chair, handing him what remained of his bottled water. “Are you ready to stop being stubborn? Take the damn sweater off. I’m going to grab you a cold towel.”

David sighed, starting to pull his sweater off. It was not an easy task; the material was heavy as it was, and clung to the sweat-soaked black t-shirt underneath. He pulled and wriggled, the neck of the sweater getting stuck around his head momentarily. A panicked whine escaped from his throat as he struggled for what felt like an eternity.When he finally emerged from this woolen limbo, he discovered two things that mortified him: the undershirt had come off with the sweater, and Patrick was standing in the doorway of the back room, staring at him. Every inch of Patrick’s exposed skin was bright pink, his eyes were wide, and his mouth was literally hanging open a little. 

“Oh, my God,” David muttered, feeling his own body flush for the millionth time that day, hurriedly extracting his t-shirt from the folds of his sweater and pulling it back on, with much difficulty. “For the sake of my dignity, please pretend you didn’t witness that.” This snapped Patrick out of…whatever he was experiencing, and he walked towards David, a damp washcloth in his hand. 

“Witness what?” Patrick asked innocently, handing the cloth to David.David took it, placing it on the back of his neck, unable to look him in the eye.

“Thank you,” he said quietly.Patrick crouched in front of the chair, forcing David to meet his gaze, which was almost too much for him. Patrick had these huge, soft, brown eyes that seemed to see right through him, terrified and exhilarated him. One of these days he was going to throw himself at Patrick, ruining their friendship and business partnership in the process. Some days David was pretty sure it would be worth it.

“You doing okay now? Did you drink some water?”David nodded. “Good. Now can I be honest with you about something?”

David eyed him warily. Patrick’s gaze was intense, and David felt so very exposed with just his t-shirt on, without his sweater covering his arms.

“Um, okay?”

Patrick hesitated for a moment. David felt like he might swoon again, brain going into overdrive, wondering what exactly Patrick was about to confess-

“I don’t think the natural deodorants you’re planning on selling work very well.” His voice dropped to a whisper, as it often did when he was teasing.“You stink, David.” He patted David’s knee twice, smirking as he stood up and walked away, leaving David feeling very lightheaded in a way that he was pretty sure had nothing to do with the temperature.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The store is hot, and Patrick is feeling a little hot and bothered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! My companion chapter from Patrick's POV. I'm not entirely happy with it, but I hope y'all enjoy anyways!

"Whoa whoa whoa," Patrick quickly walked towards David as he swayed, resting his hand on his elbow to steady him.

Sitting him down in a nearby chair, Patrick handed David his water bottle. He half expected one of David's usual snarky remarks about not wanting to drink after him, but David drank without protest.

“Are you ready to stop being stubborn? Take the damn sweater off. I’m going to grab you a cold towel.” David nodded silently, and Patrick walked into the back. Grabbing a clean cloth from the stack that David insisted on using instead of paper towels ("they're more sustainable!”, he said), he turned the tap on. Patrick absently ran his fingers under it, waiting for it to cool sufficiently.

As he waited, he thought about the look on David's face when he'd taken his shirt off earlier. He was almost certain that his business partner wasn't into him. Based on conversations he'd overheard between David and Stevie, he knew David was into men (and women, and everybody else). But thanks to those same conversations, Patrick also knew he was probably a little too straight-laced, a little vanilla for David's tastes. But on occasion- like earlier today-he would catch David looking at him in a way that made him think (maybe even hope?) otherwise.

He thought of the way David's face would turn an attractive shade of pink when he realized he'd made an innuendo or double entendre-something that happened fairly regularly.

He thought about about whether those rings David wore would feel cool if they were pressed against the damp skin of his own throat.

The sound of David whining in distress snapped him out of his daydream. He turned off the tap and headed back out front, stopped short in the doorway by the scene before him.

David was struggling to get his sweater off. Wriggling, pulling, trapped inside of it, his undershirt getting pulled along for the ride. It rucked up just past his hips first, exposing a dark, coarse happy trail that disappeared into his joggers. As David made gradual progress, more and more perfectly olive-toned skin and dark hair made an appearance. Patrick had never seen so much of David's skin; it was always hidden under layers of wool and cotton and jersey knit. Up until this moment, David's body was like a big question mark to Patrick, one he spentmore hours pondering than he'd ever admit. David was fitter than his layers would lead one to believe, and less hairy than his eyebrows would make one assume. Patrick was caught between amusement and attraction, felt his own skin heat up in a way that had nothing to do with the temperature in the store.

Patrick thought about how much he hated hot weather, preferred the crisp air of fall. He'd spent the morning sweaty and irritable, frustrated about the heat and yet another financial burden on the store. However, seeing David like this… his mood was suddenly improved. 

All too quickly, David freed himself from his predicament.

“Oh, my God. For the sake of my dignity, please pretend you didn’t witness that."He hurriedly grabbed his undershirt and pulled it back on as Patrick realized, too late, that David caught him staring at him with his jaw practically on the floor. Collecting himself, he walked toward David, handing him the damp cloth.

“Witness what?” Patrick asked, handing the cloth to David.David took the cloth from him, placing it on the back of his neck and thanking him quietly.

Patrick crouched in front of the chair, looking into David’s eyes; he’d read once that dilated pupils could be a symptom of heat stroke. They looked normal, but his proximity to David did cause him to notice something else: David reeked of sweat. Remembering David’s indignation over his aroma earlier, Patrick felt some payback was justified.

“You doing okay now? Did you drink some water?”When David nodded, he continued.“Good. Now can I be honest with you about something?”

David’s eyes narrowed suspiciously.

“Um, okay?”

Patrick paused for a moment, steeling himself to keep a straight face.

“I don’t think the natural deodorants you’re planning on selling work very well. You stink, David.” He patted David’s knee twice, enjoying David’s indignant expression for a moment before walking away.

* * *

As the rest of the afternoon wore on, David seemed quieter and more anxious than usual. 

They stood quietly on opposite sides of the front counter, labeling products, the silence making the heat and the tedium of the work all that much more oppressive.

“You okay, David?” Patrick finally asked, unable to take it anymore. He was worried that David still wasn’t feeling well, or worse, felt uncomfortable around him after catching Patrick shamelessly gaping at his body.

“Mmm, yes. Just rethinking all of my personal hygiene choices since, you know.I smell so bad.”

“I’m going to point out that you made fun of me first. And I’m not sure what you expected, considering you were wearing a rug in 300 degree heat.” David smiled sarcastically at him, a look that was normally followed by him saying “fuck off.” Perhaps the heat had stripped him of his usual acidic tongue, however, because he merely went back to labeling.

“For the record, you usually smell just fine, so I don’t think you need to rethink your entire grooming regimen.” Patrick knew he was pushing it, but he didn’t like this quiet version of David.His obvious discomfort and embarrassment hung in the air like a thundercloud.

“That’s very nice of you to say.” David responded quietly, still working on the products in front of him. Patrick tried again.

“This is where you’re supposed to say something along the lines of, ‘don’t worry, Patrick, on a normal day you don’t smell terrible either.’” David looked up at him then, the playful gleam in his eye finally having returned.

“Yes, but…you wear Old Spice.”

When he didn’t follow this up with anything else, Patrick shook his head, confused. “Yeah… And?”

“I’m not going to lie to you.”

“Ah. And what is it about Old Spice that offends the delicate sensibilities of David Rose? It’s classic.”

“Mmm, no. That’s where you’re wrong. Old Spice is for community college students trying to make a good impression at their first internship because they _think_ it’s a classic.” Patrick laughed, shaking his head.

“So let me get this straight. You don’t approve of my wardrobe, my cologne, or my choices in frames. Is there anything you _do_ like about me, David?”

David tilted his head, regarding him for a moment.

“You have…stunning business acumen.”

“Well, it’s good to know you see me as more than just a pretty face.”At this, David gave him a wry smile and went back to his labels.

The rest of the afternoon passed in a similar fashion, Patrick gently needling David when he wasn’t too busy being distracted by his exposed forearms. (His _forearms_ , for god’s sake. Patrick shuddered to think of how he would manage to compose himself if he ever actually managed to woo David into showing him more skin on purpose.) David responded in kind, pointing out everything that was incorrect about Patrick’s choices in scents, fashion, and life in general, as usual. They took more water breaks than were probably necessary, sharing Patrick’s water bottle between them. Patrick tried not to stare at David when he drank, all too aware of their lips repeatedly touching the same surface.

Later in the evening, they were getting ready to call it quits for the night. Patrick told David to go ahead and go; he could finish the last few things and lock everything up.David halfheartedly offered to stay and help, barely attempting to conceal his eagerness to get out of there. Patrick waved him off. Truthfully, Patrick enjoyed being in the store by himself for a few moments at the end of the day. It gave him a chance to decompress before going back home to face Ray’s endless chatter, and make a to-do list for the next morning without David distracting him.

“Okay, well. I’ll see you tomorrow?” David asked, gathering up his sweater and duffle bag. Patrick nodded, and David headed towards the door.

"Hey, David?"

David turned back to Patrick, one hand on the front door, ready to escape into the marginally cooler evening. 

"Maybe don't wear a sweater tomorrow. I'm definitely not catching you next time you swoon.”

David squinted, a half-hidden smirk playing on his features.

"Mmmkay. We'll see about that."David walked out with a flourish,the swing of the door closing behind him bringing in a breeze that did nothing to help cool Patrick’s flushed skin.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! You can find me on Tumblr at https://al-ex-an-d-er-hamiltons.tumblr.com


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